A GOOD STRATEGY

      Some people manage to cope with this growing-old thing much better than others. A person of my acquaintance, whom I hesitate to call a friend [*], and one who is an experienced practitioner of mountaineering black arts, has, over many years, managed to create the impression among his acquaintances that he has climbed every Munro and every Corbett (so named after the comedian Ronnie Corbett because they're a bit smaller than normal mountains) and that he has done so several times over. The truth or falsity of this claim is not relevant but it is worth noting that it is impossible to verify. This legend (as they call it in the intelligence services) has given him the opportunity to avoid strenuous outings by saying that he had "done it" too many times would prefer to go up some other hill on his own. The hill of his choice is always some obscure hummock whose existence had been hitherto unknown to the rest of the party. Later, as the party reassembles at the hut, there is no way to disprove his claims of "an excellent day" which could have been (and probably was) spent beside an open fire in some secluded pub.


An excellent day

[*] he seeks me out once per year in order to tell me very loudly and with obvious relish I HAVE NOT READ YOUR BOOK NOBLE. His use of the erroneous singular is, of course, deliberate. I hope and trust he will persist in this ignorant behaviour with respect to this little offering.